Miss Makeover: Sodomy is Satan's Way of showing he loves us.

By on October 31, 2010

I have to fuck a  tranny with my strap-on tonight, ‘Antonia’ aka Tony from Tooting, doing to him what ‘American Psycho’ Brett Asshole Ellis does to the English language. Although the money won’t be as good and I won’t be dwelling compulsively on the torture of women. Still, that’s where the money is eh Brett? You pathetic little dweeb.
I have a number of gorgeous silicone implements we might as well call ‘tools’. These fit into a gorgeous custom leather holster which straps around my pelvis and thighs. Once I’m tooled up, bottle of lube nearby, submissive male pleading to be cherry-picked, I am close to being happy in my work.
Geezer is helping me prepare, making it clear that he, too, could do with being fucked. It’s been far too long since the last time and he’s ready to take it like a man. That is to say, like a greedy cockslut begging for more. Much as I love it, you have to limit strap-on time, otherwise I’d never get fucked and that would never do.
“Do you have to do that?” I ask Geezer. He is qualching orange juice straight out of the carton (Qualch – to drink from a waxed cardboard carton, especially greedily or messily. It might be of ‘dubious’ origins but it’s a wizard word. Sounds right. Looks right.)
“What?” he says. Light dawns. “Oh for fuck’s sake…’
“And do you have to say that all the time?”
“Shall I be all girly?” Geezer is suddenly en femme, about as accurate as most of my clients. “Oh my God! Oh my God!” he shrieks, hopping around wide eyed, perhaps a little too good at being camp for his own peace of mind.
“Why is it that hard men are always really good at imitating Gays?” I ask, although it’s risking some severe chastisement.
“Because they’re all secretly arse!” says Geezer, grabbing me somewhere rude and proceeding to say and do a lot of things that they wouldn’t like on the Guardian women’s page. Being a real girl rather than a frumpy student I am soon keen for more, after a token show of resistance, just so he can feel even more manly by ‘overpowering me’.
By the time we’ve finished my tranny is knocking on the door. There is no rest for the wicked. Although Geezer can now smugly watch men kicking a ball around while I slave away next door, ploughing a particularly well-used furrow.

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